DAY TRADING DOUCHEBAGS

The 3rd Stooge has Entered the Building

If you thought Wade and Tait were piss poor traders, you haven't meant every market makers dream - Don.

He currently holds the record for most trades in one day - 89. (He also holds the record for longest unintentional celibacy, but that's a different blog.)

He claims he's looking for a way to defund his retirement.  Congrats.  You're on your way.

Let's get back to the 89 trades for a moment.  That's about $1800 in commissions in one day. 

You know how American Express has a black card for big spenders?

Don holds an E-Trade black card.

Rumor is that when he threatened to go to Options Xpress, E-Trade set up a corner office for him with his own assistant to run errands so he didn't have to pull himself away from the computer.

He's never told us how much he was down that day, but at cards that night he showed up with a bunch of rolled pennies.

Welcome aboard Don! 

 

 

**ALERT** Potential Douche Trade of the Year

"Hang on." said the carni.  "This one;s gonna be a doozy."

With the insight of a blind man, on MAY 7, Wade decides to buy 20 calls on QQQ.  He thinks he sees an opening.

More like a sinkhole.

He checks his account thirty seconds later - down $400.  WTF he thinks.

Qs immediately dropped after his trade.  But here's what separates the men from the douchebags of the world.  He realizes he bought MAY 8th expirations!

In what can only be described as blind panic, he dumps the lot.

Too bad the market took off ten minutes later.  He would have made a grand instead of headlines.

This trade was like his sex life.  In and out in 2 minutes with nothing but disappointment and regret after.

We honestly wish we were making this up. 

We assume this was his reaction getting the news.